What Jesus Would Drive: From

Sunday, November 24, 2002
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What Jesus Would Drive: From Bob Wallace - fellow LewRockwell.com writer – who culled these from various FreeRepublic.com posts:

* One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because “the Bible says God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury.”

* But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Lord to “pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm.”

* Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks because Moses’ followers are warned not to go up a mountain “until the Ram’s horn sounds a long blast.”

* Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn’t like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John’s gospel where Christ tells the crowd, “For I did not speak of my own Accord . . . ”

* Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that “the roar of Moses’ Triumph is heard in the hills.”

* Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: “Joshua’s Triumph was heard throughout the land.”

* And, following the Master’s lead, the Apostles carpooled in a Honda: “The Apostles were in one Accord”!

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